Why the fuck can’t I say something without being ridiculed? I consult on social media strategy yet clients question every decision I make on the ‘gram. I call my mother to ask advice on my current job and all I remember her saying is “keep your mouth shut.” I used to know a thing about creative writing but even this blog has gone to shit (sorry, y’all).

What is life? I ask myself this everyday, at least. Usually once in the morning when I’m putting on my face, and again during the day when my life feels utterly exhausting and mundane at my office job. Feeling guilty asking to work from home, and utterly ashamed to take time off. Is any of this worth it?

Even when I achieve what I want—a cannabis marketing and influencing job with all the weed you could dream—I’ll never have it all. I’ll never control everything. Something will always go wrong and I’ll always get hurt. I live in the most beautiful place on earth, but I’ll always suffer from depression. I make friends everywhere I go but I don’t have my family. I pinch the mountains with my fingers but long for my feet at the ocean. I have time but I don’t have love.